I write today’s post with full awareness there are such larger events more important than my blog. The wave of violence created by federal agents in Minneapolis made me quite hesitant to stick to today’s topic—budgeting. I decided to not adjust my focus, because I know how much of a difference better budgeting makes in reducing our stress (something we can control amid all those larger things sometimes outside our sphere of influence). Before I jump in today, it is my sincerest hope to see some restraints put on ICE and Border Patrol. If their actions were truly in upholding the law, they wouldn’t be running around in unmarked vehicles, masked, entering homes without warrants and failing to properly identify themselves and delaying care to assaulted protestors. This time of thugs has got to go.

Getting to serve you all within my capacity, you deserve to feel more control over your money (regardless of how much you bring home). We live in a society too often asking us to part ways with our money, be it requests to support your kid(s)’s school, political campaigns, local businesses, big box brands and their onslaught of advertising, and so forth. You are under no obligation to cave into peer pressure; as the saying goes, you cannot pour from an empty cup. Everyone draining your coffers conveniently for them also don’t or rarely contribute back to you in your time of need (in case you ever felt guilty for saying “no” or “not today” to their causes).

I recently finished reading Tori Dunlap’s Financial Feminist: Overcome the Patriarchy’s Bullsh*t to Master Your Money and Build a Life You Love. Some of the things she discusses are things I’ve implemented before reading her book or listening to her podcast, Her First $100k. She is honest about her disdain for Dave Ramsey’s outdated rules for financial freedom. And I’ve mentioned before that his teachings were causing me more financial stress than they were relieving. I also want to take a moment and say how fiscally scary it is to carry cash envelopes; if you get robbed, there goes money you cannot necessarily get back. If a person steals your credit or debit card, you can work more easily with your bank and contest the charges, reducing your liability for losses. Years ago, someone got access to one of my card numbers—still not sure how—and there was a charge for a flight to London. I coordinated with my bank and within a few days the situation was fixed. (My parents helped me financially for a few days while I waited for a new debit card since I was back in their state instead of where I lived at the time.)

Her guidance might rub something people the wrong way, and that’s ok. Her words point out directly systemic oppression’s role in crafting financially inequality between racial groups and men and women. Her frequent use of swear words might be off putting to others as well—personally, I use the word f*ck all the time, so who am I to judge?!

Do I follow everything she discusses in her book? No. Like she said, personal finance is personal. You mix and match based on your needs and goals. It’s a bit like finding a recipe you’re quite certain you’ll enjoy, but as you’re tasting it, you find it needs something added or swapped in due to liking other flavors (travel’s not your thing, ok save for something else you value more) or due to missing the ingredient in your pantry (in your case, say an employer doesn’t match your retirement contributions equally).

My financial picture changed dramatically last year, a good reason to re-evaluate financial goals. And it could potentially change (for better or worse) within the next five months. I am in the window of time where I should hear if my position is renewed. With my current health issues, it has been important to recognize if the role is not extended, I need to keep looking for positions less likely to exacerbate my problems. (Oh so much fun to have this extra layer of stress while job hunting as a pre-caution.) I generally like my position plus it pays well, so it would be ideal to have it renewed for another year. Staying in the same role has an added benefit that my supervisor is aware of my health issues and supportive of last minute health appointments when I need them. I also know, should I struggle with medication side effects or worsening symptoms, once I am past my 12 month mark, there is always FMLA leave I could access. Granted, I also could put in an ADA request at any time. (I haven’t taken advantage of my ADA rights at this time, but I do plan to submit a request after some additional medical tests.) 

With financial planning, I like relying on more than 3 buckets that Tori directs money to “go into.” The 3 buckets is great for beginners and people who don’t want to think too hard about their money. Right now, my husband and I still struggle with excess spending (like groceries and dining out) that I like seeing the percentages of individual category expenditures to help me track progress and setbacks. 

To aid me in my task this year, I chose Monarch as our budgeting app. (Note: This is not a sponsored post. I used my own funds to pay for the app.) They offered a 50% discount (still on their site as of this writing with the code NEWYEAR2026), making it worth the try. I had used YNAB (You Need A Budget) previously and their site kept having issues not syncing properly with my accounts, so my transactions were falling behind in being recorded. Not great when you paid for an app to make tracking easier. 

I love that Tori asks her audience, what is your first money memory? and mine feels pretty easy to recall. My mom was sitting at our dining room table interviewing me for paid household chores. The pay was paltry but I leapt at the chance to make money. Reflecting on the experience, it was pretty wise of her to interview us kids to make the tasks feel more important. (She also followed through and evaluated our adherence to cleaning up to her standards.) Me desire to support myself hasn’t changed much in life; as a kid, I took on more paid chores because I wanted more access to money and my almost relentless pursuit of higher education to make more helps me avoid being unable to attend to my wants. Needs are not being ignored here; I think I just realized the past several years that I could find something to support my family’s needs, but I wanted to ensure we’d do more than just survive. 

Tori’s idea to keep a money diary is a task I feel can be accomplished a bit more easily using Monarch as each transaction has a section to put in a note. I’ve used it recently to annotate why my phone bill spending was higher. After years of carting around an iPhone12, I upgraded, which could have been delayed a little but my phone’s battery life struggles didn’t make me sad to consider a replacement. I take some pride in not always getting the latest gadget: to me, it would be a waste of money.  

When I look at Tori’s idea of three money value (non-need based) categories mine are as follows: 

• Travel
• Groceries (beyond the basics, I’m talking food exploration type experiences)
• Dining out (enjoying new foods and ogling restaurant decor is fun for me)

The top three things that matter least to me:

• Designer clothes and accessories
• “Beauty” splurges (say no to Botox!)
• Exercise classes/gym memberships (I can sweat it out for free at home in my comfy clothes.)

My financial goals coming up in the next few years: 

• Overseas trip this year (still saving)
• Hawaii trip next year (start saving later this year after our overseas trip is done)
• Fully funded emergency fund (full funding planned by May 2029)
• Japan trip 2028 (start saving after this year’s overseas trip is done)

These goals matter for a few different reasons. First, my husband and I love travel, but we’ve never done a fun trip together overseas. Most of our travels were with the Marine Corps. Second, Hawaii was on our radar in for 2020 and then this not-so-little nightmare called the pandemic derailed us a few times from going there. That emergency fund matters. If I hit a bump in the road where I cannot work for health reasons or with of us ends up unemployed, I’ve over-planned our savings by assuming funding needs with both of us being out of the workforce. And Japan, well that is a gift for our future high school graduate. 

I am grateful my views towards debt have changed. I used to feel it was always bad and the right educators have taught me otherwise. Learning when debt is a tool to leverage versus when it is a burden is something I think we should all learn sooner in life whether or not we choose to take advantage of it. 

Now, that being said, I still wish the SAVE plan would have been allowed to go through. I qualified for Pell Grants while working on my undergraduate degrees and in 2013, the year after I graduated, I started a position making only $32,500 a year. The plan would have offset the years I struggled and it is hard to still see how much our society favors businesses, using the example of those businesses who obtained forgivable Paycheck Protection Program (PPP) loans during the pandemic while a lot of government officials criticize students who took loans out for their education and entered a workforce with stagnant wages. 

My financial priorities have changed over the years. Back in June 2017 money was tight. I left my pretty poorly paying job that paid into Arizona State Retirement (a bit under 12% contributed by me and an equal match by my employer). If memory serves me correctly, I was making about $36,000 and left for an only slightly higher paying position at $38,000, but the other employer, Grand Canyon University, did not pay into Arizona State Retirement. The small stretch in my monthly take-home was ultimately not worth it in the end. GCU’s low contribution to my 401(k)—I believe it was a 30 cents to the dollar as an employee I contributed and only up to 3% employee contribution, so even if I had more money to spare any extra contribution on my part resulted in no extra employer contribution. So, here’s how it looks. For a $38,000 salary, the 3% employee contribution is $1,140. 30% of my $1,140 leaves me with $342 my old employer oh so graciously chucks my way. 

If we looked at the same salary with an employer who pays into the Arizona State Retirement System, the results are dramatically better—assuming you can take a hit in your take home pay. ASRS currently is at a 12% contribution rate. This means the employer and employee both contribute $4,560 off the $38,000 salary. Nice, right?! What I wouldn’t give to go back and make some more financially sound decisions for myself!!!

Now, my goal is to stick it out with any one of the ASRS employers for however long I live in this state. ASRS is a defined benefit plan (guaranteed monthly benefit at retirement) compared to a 401k. Older me likes this safety net a lot more and having less take home pay is something I can manage now. 

Now, my responsibility to myself is to continue to always make enough that I can stick with an ASRS employer and ride the lower take home pay to serve the “retiree” me I hope to be someday. I don’t know if I’ll stay with the same employer I’m with currently; it is an option I’m exploring, but I’m keeping my eyes open for other opportunities, too. 

Aside from looking to retain my current salary, my husband and I are working on reducing certain expenditures in our lives to have more discretionary money for other purposes like domestic and international travel. We are opting to dial back some on grocery shopping and reigning in our dining out budget. We are going through a home loan refinance. We lose roughly a year of progress so we can take advantage of a 1% interest rate reduction. Bringing some closing costs to the table temporarily reduces our overall savings, but we’ll make up the difference before the year ends. If we were say 12 years into our mortgage, refinancing wouldn’t make any sense, but right now, it will give us an additional $400 or so buffer each month that matters if I don’t stay in my current role. Avoiding car loans is nice, too. Not taking on car loans is another way we’re reducing expenses in our lives. We have two paid off cars; mine is 7 years old and has less than 37,000 miles on it (one of the few gifts of the pandemic was driving a whole lot less!). I want to keep my car for at least another 5 years if it continues to run well. Once our daughter starts driving and later on drives a lot on her own, my husband’s car will become her vehicle and he’ll get a new car.

So that was a lot. I’m been itching to write about our financial journey, so thanks for walking this path with me today. 

—Cheryl